Siddhartha to Buddha - Journey of a young man

Remember I told you that recently I brought a few books t read? Presently I am reading the book “Buddha – a story of enlightenment” by Deepak chopra. It's a very good book and truly a page turner. I am happy I purchased that book.

I have always been attracted to Buddha and his teachings. In fact I still remember the first book I read on Buddha’s teachings when I was in 12th. His teachings are simple, practical and scholarly. It now feels good to read about how Siddhartha – the prince renounced everything and became a God.

Siddhartha was, like any one of us, a mortal when he was born. I am sure he felt all the emotions that we feel as humans. I am sure he was not a god from the word go. Definitely he might have had all the shortcomings that we have as humans as well. But then, what is it that made Siddhartha, a mere mortal to be included into the ranks of the god?

I think the reason why Siddhartha became Buddha was because he listened to his heart. He had the entire world at his feet. He was prince of a state. He was having riches that any of us would give our life to have. He was destined to be a great worrier to rule over the four corners of the world. But he renounced all that. And his renouncement was that of a highest kind. What’s the meaning of renouncing wealth if you are beggar? What’s the meaning of renouncing if you are already old and about to die? What’s the meaning of renouncing if you don't of anyone who cares about you?

Siddhartha was bold enough to leave his wealth, crown and family members at a very young age and walk into the realm of the unknown. He followed his heart and set on a journey to find his destiny. It just takes a split second to think how difficult and courageous a decision he took at that young age.

No, I am not a Buddhist. No, I don't plan to become a Buddhist in near future. But what I do like is a young man’s journey to know himself. I do like a person who fights against all odds to find his destiny. I do like a person who becomes a god from human with sheer will power. I do like a person who has nothing in his heart but love for his fellow creatures. I do like Buddha as a person. His life inspires me.

Through this Book I intend to walk with Buddha on his journey for enlightenment. I intend to at lest make a feeble attempt to know his joys, fears, loss and triumphs. Don’t worry! I will keep you posted about anything beautiful that I come across :-)

Hectic week..

It has been a very hectic last couple of days. Seen a lot and went through a lot. I could not put posts because of the intensity and business of these days. I recount here a few things that both eat up my time and also made me happy.

Of course the list is topped by – finish of first semester MBA exam. God!!!! It feels great. So what if a few of my friends say that the evaluation of the MBA papers is very difficult. That I may as well not scrap through my exams. At lest I attempted the exam and gave my best shot, and I am happy for that. I have already written about my first set of papers last week. Last week I had studied and had been to exam. The story was quite different this week. I had not studied that well. This was because of a combination of some surprise packages I got during the end of last week (more about it in my future posts). But, God is great!!!! The exam did not go as bad as I had expected it to be. Though the second paper (managerial effectiveness) was a difficult, with God’s grace, I think I will scrap through it.

The second thing that happened was that I went shopping for Good books this week. Totally I brought about 6 books and spent close to 1500 rupees. But all the books are great – worth their weight it gold. I will definitely write about what these book wonderful books in future posts. Yeah, yeah, I know some people will think if it’s worth buying so many books? Will I read all these books? Well for them my answer is – I love books and am creating my own mini library.

There is one more surprise package of the week. I will not write it here now. I will touch upon it after a few weeks. It has everything Drama, humor, adventure, anticipation, suspense and a lot of susheelish twists and turns. I am dying to write about it, but Amol will kill me if I write anything about it now :-). Also, I realize it’s not the right time to blog about it now.

One more disturbing thing of this week is the news I read about post Godhara confessions. I came across these articles through a blog friend of mine. I really really hate these people killing each other in the name of religion. I hate them soo much that even as I type this my hands are shivering with anger for such kind of fanatics. Who has given them the right to kill in the name of religion? Do they even know their religion? Has Ram personally told them to kill at will? Do they understand Hinduism in the first place? Do they have even a little bit of brain in their rotten heads? Do they understand humanity? Are they humans? How can we even have such kind of lunatics in civilized society? How the hell can anyone kill in the name of God? God who takes care of everything - from a worm crawling in the soil to the mightiest of elephants – like his own children? God who brings in day, night all the seasons with such preciseness? How can anyone kill people in the name of God? How? How? How??????

Last but not the lest – Work pressure. Work came back with a vengeance for me taking leave. I had to complete a lot of unfinished work. And of course I had a few bickering with my boss. I sometimes love to work. I have a very very active mind. Always something or the other is going on in my mind. I am very restless. If I don't find anything to do, I will catch the nearest person and start talking with him endlessly. I simple don't like to sit idle. Work eases me a bit. It keeps my mind engaged. It keeps me grounded.

All in all a mixed package last couple of days. It was a very hectic and difficult week. I am sooooo happy to be alive :-)

Opportunity...

Opportunity, it is said, is small window in life to God’s grace. It is through opportunities that God tells you how much he likes you. He tells you how enthusiastic he is to see you performing at your best. At the same time he also wants you to see recognize him through these small windows. If you are busy, lousy or careless, you will miss opportunities. And opportunities missed are success lost.

I have had a very good stay in my present company. I have had great friends here. I have learnt a lot professionally here. But slowly a lot of my friends and like minded people started to leave this company. New people began to come in who neither understood me nor did they respect my past work. Slowly I began to feel dejected and a started to look out elsewhere for newer opportunities. I might have approached a dozen companies. I gave interviews that lasted two minutes to one and a half hour. There is hardly any opportunity that I missed that came my way. But I cam back from every interview empty handed. I particularly remember one company where I cleared the interview four times – without the HR giving me a call. I started to get frustrated. I began to feel I am loosing all the opportunities that are coming my way. My friends say I am pretty good at work. Why then was I not able to secure even a job change? Am I good enough in the first place? Why is God making fun of me by showing so many mirages?

Yesterday I sat and thought as all these facts ran through my mind. I thought instead of being too judgmental or pessimistic, I will count the positives that I have got. Maybe God wants me to know teach the lesson of patience. Maybe I have not got the right opportunity because he is still out there, hunting the right job for me. Maybe he wants me to work with not so pleasant people to teach me the importance of friends. Maybe he wants to toughen me up. Maybe he is readying me for bigger and better battles. Maybe he wants to test how much faith I have on him. Maybe he does not want to show me small window of his grace. Perhaps, he wants to open a door full of opportunities for me.

It is when all these thoughts were passing through my mind, that I got a call from a company. My telephonic interview was over. I cleared it – as usual. Now they want me to come over to have a face to face talk so that another round of comprehensive interview can be done. I don't know if this is again a small prank God is playing with me or is it truly the door that I have been waiting for. Only time and perhaps God knows what’s going to happen.

For the time being a small window seems to be open. I have faith in God’s grace. I will go and peep through it. Let’s see what’s waiting for me :-)

There is soo much to learn!!!!

Today my long weekend finally comes to an end. After three days of being a student, one day of writing exam and another day of lazing around, tomorrow I have to go back to office. The honeymoon comes to an end.

I still have two more exams coming Sunday before my first semester comes to an end. Today I was studying from the book called “Business communication”. From that book I learnt about the importance of listening skills. I learnt about how important it is have interpersonal skills in you official life. I learnt different ways of conflict resolution. I learnt about different ways of negotiation. I learnt how important it is to give praise. I learnt the importance of giving and accepting criticisms.

After reading this book, I felt I have sooo much to learn. This made me think about lerearning itself as a process. If we take things correctly, there is so much there is that we can learn even from a routine day. But the first thing that we need to understand is, perhaps, that there is a lot of learning out there that we have to do.

Is it not starange that unless we attempt to know something, we don't even know about its existence? For example, if I have not taken up the MBA course and not read the book I was mentioning, I probably would not even know that there is a seicence behing praising, negotiating, motivating, negotiating and what not. In fact if we are ope enough, there are so many things that we can learn even from everyday instances. But the first step is to realize that – Yes, I have to learn something new.

In an official setup – When my boss scolds me, I learn how I should not behave with my subordinates. When the implementation team rejects even my best thought plan, I can learn that I still have a lot of things to think about before drafting a final plan. When my collogues disagree with me, I can learn that I don't know the entire dimension of a problem.

In family setup – I see my dad and learn the importance of sacrificing your personal comfort so that your near and dear ones are happy. When I see my mom, I learn how important unconditional love is. When I see my brother, I learn how brilliant a young man can be. When I see my sister, I learn what all I would have missed if I did not have a sister. When I see my relatives, I learn how manipulative people can get to get to their needs.

With friends – I learn how different people can be and still be caring. I learning how important it is to belong to a group and still be unique. I learn the importance of support. I learn, there is still soo much to learn.

Yes, it’s really strange that when you open your mind a little wider, you know how much there is to learn. Everyday seems to be filled with so many lessons - if we are willing to learn. How wonderful it would be if I could somehow learn to learn the leasons of daily life. :-)

First MBA exam over!!!

I got over with my first pair of MBA exams today. Gosh!!!!! I am tired. It’s been years since I used to keep sitting in one place. In office we tend to move around a bit. While studying I roam around/listen to music. I am also used to the constant chatter and noise of office and my roommates. It’s today that I realized how difficult it is sit quietly for 6 hours (in two sets of three hours each) in pin drop silence and concentrate every nerve of yours towards solving a question paper.

The day by itself started in a typical Susheel way. I thought the exam starts at 10:30, but actually the exam was scheduled to start at 10:00!!!! (God!! How careless I am). Reporting time was 9:30!!! At 9:30, I was still in room and had just finished taking bath. Got ready and came out singing, happy that I am leaving an hour early for my exam. It was when I pulled out my Admit card to give the address of my exam hall to the rickshaw driver, that I realized that the exam starts at 10 and I have only 15 minutes to reach the exam center. And to top all that, I was so busy studying all these days that I did not even know when my exam center is physically located. Just imagine what might be going through my mind. I could hear my hear beat above the sound of the rickshaw and the traffic. After every breadth, I was cursing myself for being the most careless person to walk on the face of this earth!!!!!!!

Luckily, today was a Sunday and that too vijaydashami (It's the day when people wash their vehicles and worship it) traffic was less. I reached my exam center in about 10 minutes (God is great). Hah, by the way did I mention, I forgot my watch in the mad rush? Anyway I ran into my exam center just when the bell rang. It took me some time to catch my breath back. Slowly settled down and began to read the question paper.

Still I could not believe how careless a person I am and why I do not improve even after soo many bad lessons. Still I could not believe how I have been thinking about this exam for more then a month now – only to ignore seeing the correct time of the commencement of the exam. Gosh!!!! Have you met the most careless man in this world?? If no, you are most welcome to meet me!!!!!

The first paper was OK. I attempted all the 100 questions. But the problem is that it is an objective type paper. And in objective type papers you always tend to think you have done well till you get the actual marks. At least I hope I can clear the exams.

The second paper was a bit difficult as compared to the first. Here too I attempted all the 100 questions. I think at least 70% is correct, but lets wait and see what the results have to say (results are expected in next one month). Of course, my only fear is that if there is negative marking, I am dead.

Mom (who knows me like the back of her hand) called me twice to tell me not to forget anything and be less careless – How sweet of her. But, I think even mom does not know that some things do not change. I think my carelessness is one such thing.

All in all, apart from the initial shock of the beginning of the day everything went fine. I am expecting to at lest pass in both the papers. My next exam is on coming Sunday 28th of this month. Yeah, yeah, I will be more careful that time around. For the time being – it’s OK :-)

PS: Will I ever become responsible and more organized???

Exams tomorrow..!!!

Yeah, yeah…I know – Exams tomorrow. Tomorrow will be my first MBA exam on “Introduction to management”. Next Sunday I have one more exam on “Managerial effectiveness” and my first semester exams will be over. Yesterday too I had taken study leave. Felt so good, being a student again – Wonderful.

Frankly speaking, I am surprised by own motivation to study. After all it’s been more then three years since I last studied for an exam. Studying has really not lost its charm as far as I am concerned. The discipline, concentration and the will power that it calls for to write an exam is really exiting. I have never been a brilliant student in college days. No topper or the most brilliant kid in school. I have always had to study hard even to get OK OK score. But still, somehow, I have always loved to study and be a student.

At the end of the day, I saw the book that I had finished. Could not believe I had finished such a big fat book. It also brought back memories of my Engineering college days. It also brought back memories of – believe it or not - my Mom.

It’s so easy to take things for granted. I still remember how supportive my mom used to be during my exam days. I used to get hourly tea. Just tell my mom when I have to get up and no matter how ungodly hour of the day it might be, Mom used to wake me up. Any disappointing performance in exam and my Mom would always be by my side to perk me up. She used to cook my favorite dishes so that I have my stomach full. I still remember her telling me – Eat fully and fill the answer paper fully. I can’t stop remembering her enthusiasm to see me doing my level best. Maybe, it’s because of her that I love being a student.

Now I am staying in a bachelor room. Got to go to office in the morning and make time for myself in the night to study. An hour of study will make you feel tired, because you don't have even a table and chair to sit and study. No hourly tea now. If you have to study, you have to get up – nobody will wake you or remind you. Have food if you are hungry, else leave. One person perking you up is yourself. There are soo many things that we take for Granted.

Yes, I might be becoming a bit incoherent in writing. Yes, I might be becoming unnecessarily emotional. But, that's Susheel for you.

Tomorrow is my exams – I love you and miss you, Mom :-)

Productivity...

I had a very good day today. No office, no calls, no mad rush, no quarrel with collogues and/or boss. I have taken leave from office and devoted the entire day to studying. It was a wonderful feeling - felt like a student again (I have always loved being a student).

I almost finished the entire book on "Introduction to management" but for the last chapter. Today I learnt about different control techniques in management. I also learnt about Operational research (OR). OR caught my imagination almost at once. OR is the field of management that uses mathematical modeling to solve the various management related issues (like human resource calculation, inventory ordering, risk analysis etc). It helps managers to make optimal and most logical decisions under uncertainty. Hmm...interesting. Math has a say in management as well, felt good to know that.

After the entire day was over, one of my very good friends - Amol - called me. We chatted routinely and he asked me how much hours I have put in to study and what all I have learnt. The discussion went back to our engineering days and he was surprised to know I used to study for almost 12 hours a day during our preparation holidays. He was of the opinion that studying that much did not actually give good "productivity". This got me thinking.

I felt that whatever he was telling was very reasonable. It also made me think more about the concept of productivity itself. The most commonly used interpretation of productivity is Productivity = (output/input). It is the output that we generate per unit of input. If this ratio is more, the productivity is considered to be more. This is correct when we are talking about machines and other non living things. But, I feel, this definition is not correct when human beings are involved.

When humans are involved, productivity is so much more then the ratio of input to output. Let me try and clarify. A student may study for 12 hours and yet not get good scores, in general terms you may say that his/her productivity is low. But, this teaches the student the importance of tenacity, never say die attitude and a passion for striving hard to get results. A fresh graduate may give interviews in about 10 companies before getting a final job. In general terms you may say that the productivity of the person in 10 previous attempts was zero. But it is this zero productivity activity that gave him much needed experience so that he can clear on the 11th attempt. Are you getting what I am trying to say??

Life for many of us is so much like a tennis game. You can have control over the ball only when it is in your court. Once you have hit that ball across to the other court, you do not have control over the ball or what your opponent does with it. Productivity for me is doing your best when the ball is in your court. It does not matter if you miss the ball, so long as you have stretched to your maximum extent possible. Your productivity should be measured by the amount of effort you are putting in when the ball is in you court. You are ultra productive if you are doing best in your court. You are unproductive if you are not playing up to your best of abilities.

Thank you Amol for your chat with me today :-)

What a wonderful day...!!!!!

Today was a Wonderful day!!!!!! It is these days that make you happy for being alive. Today was so good that I thought that I should slowly chronicle the entire day and register it in this post.

After many days I got up early today (even though I slept at 2:00 in the morning yesterday). I had the sense to study my courseware. I was lucky enough to complete one full chapter on different techniques of control systems. I learned about the types of control systems. I learnt about the different ways to measure the key indicators of the financial health of a company. I also learnt about feed forward, concurrent and feedback control mechanisms. Well begun in half done. What a wonderful day...

The next best thing that happened was that I was not going to office. My Job as transmission engineer in Nokia requires me to go on “field” some days. I am supposed to do surveys, to provide microwave connectivity to our client Vodafone. Today was my lucky day; I got a call in the morning at around 9:00 and was told to go for an urgent survey near Ramoji film city. Ramoji film city is around 40 Kms from my room. The climate was good and I was supposed to go on a looong drive… what a wonderful day.

The purpose of my survey was to put a tower on top of a hill near Ramoji film city. This tower will give great mileage for transmission connectivity to Vodafone in the years to come and I had proposed it Vodafone – and they approved it. To do the survey I had to climb the hill (Which, by the way was the tallest hill in that place). It was a great trekking experience. Yes, I have claimed a lot of hills in the process of doing my survey. But, today’s climb made it more important because the climate was great and I was also accompanied by civil experts. I showed the part of the hill that had to be blasted off boulders so that the tower can be built… what a wonderful day.

I must also tell you I like to take photographs. During my travels and my moments with my friends, I have clicked a lot of photos. In fact the total size of my photos amount to about 1 GB. Recently there was a national photography competition organized in my company – Nokia. The theme of the competition was “Nature” (The photos were to be clicked only with a mobile and not a digital camera). Thanks to my travels, I have been lucky enough to click a lot of nature photos. I had submitted one such photo just for the sake of it. And know what, my friend called in and told me that I have won the first prize in India. I am attaching the photo that won me this prize here… What a wonderful day.

Generally acquiring a site to erect a tower takes about 15 – 20 days. Luckily, the owner of the house had also come to see his site. We immediately caught up with him. He was a jovial old man. He was a very interesting person of around 60+ years. Age had caught up with him and he had become a little deaf. But this had not stolen his zest for living. He narrated a lot of stories about how he came to Hyderabad, how he went on to make money and finally at this age he was the owner of thousand Acers of land spread all over AP!!!!! Felt good to talk to this person. Better still, he agreed to our proposed price for using his land to put a tower and the site was acquired in less then three hours… what a wonderful day.

Since we were so near to Ramoji film city, we thought we will pay a visit to that place. It's a great place to visit. Great scenery, fresh air and beautiful faces all around. We roamed around and clicked some great photos (I will give upload some of my photos in my future blogs). We also saw a shooting taking place in one of the sets. Public are not allowed to go into the sets when picture shooting is taking place. We told the security guards that we are from Vodafone and are here to check for signals. We were allowed to go inside. Not only did we see the shooting, we also saw Ali (a famous comedian of the Telugu film industry) up close and in action… What a wonderful day.

Came back to room quite late. Had a look at the calendar and a chill ran through my spines. Only two more days to go for my exam, I have to study soo much!!!!! I toyed with the idea of calling up my boss and asking for two days of study leave. But I was sure my boss will never give me a single day leave. In any case I thought I will try my luck and called him up. Not only was I permitted to take two days study leave, my boss also wished me luck for my exam!!!!!! … What a wonderful day.

And here I am 1:00 in the night, smiling at myself as I write this in my blog… What a wonderful day :-)

Difference of opinion...

Again I came to room early from office - to study. I came to room and thought I will blog instead. After all I have been studying since long a little blogging will do no harm (will power development required).

While traveling from office to room, I was thinking about the various differences of opinions that exist among people. What made me think is not this fact, but the fact that two people can think entirely in different direction, and still be correct in their own way.

Just have a look at the attached picture. What I see is a beautiful young lady maybe in her mid twenties. So beautiful that maybe I will ask her out for dinner. But in the same photo someone else may see an old lady, probably in her eighties and definitely not a person who could be taken for a dinner. But both the views are equally true. Look carefully - and you will find both young and old lady in the same photo.

So many things in real life are also similar. I might be feeling that my boss is pressurizing me too much but my boss might be thinking I am not co operating fully. I might feel that a person is committing a sin by robbing but the robber might think that he is making a living. I might think that I am relaxing myself by blogging, my friends might feel that with 4 days to go for exam I am wasting my time. I might feel that the lady walking on the road is not so pretty, but she might be the prettiest person alive for her husband. I might think of myself as a big man, my parents might think I am still a child. I might feel that a father is the financial head of the family, someone else might feel that a mother should be the financial head of the family. I might feel that a mother should be the emotional head of the family, someone else might feel that we are limiting a woman by confining her to the home.

What is most wonderful is that however contradicting both the views might look; both of them are equally true in their own right. What I personally feel is that as far human emotions are concerned, there is nothing called as pure truth or pure lie. What is true for one person might be a lie for someone else.

What is point I have learnt from these observation is that I should not be Judgmental. Maybe I should try and see things from other person's point of view. Yes, in doing so I might loose my viewpoint and I might become vulnerable. But I think its takes courage and wisdom to look at things from other person's point of view. I might not have learnt it now, but definitely would love to have this positive trait with me as I grow.

Life, I feel is soo complicated. The last thing that it can be is a series of YES/NO. The highest paradox is that anything can be correct and wrong - at the same time. An image can be a young lady and old women - all at the same time. :-)

Lakshya...

Could not get up early today :-( - which implies I could not read much on my MBA today. Yeah - I did read a bit about the control function of management, nothing worth writing here. I then decided I will come early from office and study.

I did come early from office, but instead of studying, I saw the movie "Lakshya". Lakshya is one of my favorite movies. Apart from brilliant acting, direction and choreography, the reason I like this movie is because I am soo similar to the Hrithik in the first half of the movie.

I am careless. I don’t know exactly what to do. I believe in peer communication a lot. I considering doing a lot of things at the same time - I chew more then I can probably digest. The song "Main aisa kuyon hoon..." in this movie, I have always thought represents me soo well. I am very very similar to hrithik's character in the first half of the movie.

But then again, have a look at poster of that movie that I have posted here. What you probably see is a shabby, careless young man yawning. But in the shadow you see a fighter, ready for a battle. I too have always believed in my own strange way that I have some greater purpose to serve. Yes, I don’t know what that purpose exactly is. Yes, logically I might be wrong. But my gut feeling always says that it’s just a matter of time before I find my true passion, once I do it - there is no one stooping me. I will then wear my passion on my sleeve and an alive and beating heart in my palm and run towards my destiny.

I have considered what my present passions are. I am recounting some of them here. I want to be the best human I know of. I want to be brilliant in at least one field of my life. I have fallen in love once, but at least once I want to rise in love. I want to travel different places. I want to be friend to different people from different places. The list seems endless...

But are any of these the true destiny of my life? Is there something greater I am supposed to achieve? For Hrithek's character in the movie, it took him 24 years and 1800 feet to find himself. I don’t know what it will take me to find myself. Till then I will wait and consider my life as a journey to find my destiny.

Leadership...

I have now become paranoid about my MBA exams. I want to clear the Exam at any cost. Of course, the fact that I have taken correspondence course makes the matter a little more difficult. On top of that I am having a very demanding Job, a Job that is full of mental pressure and also requires me to move “on field” now and then make the matter a little more complicated.

But the fact that I have always loved to read and immensely enjoy being a student has helped me a lot. I thought how I can make my preparation and revision interesting. I got a very brilliant idea. I decided I will play by my strengths. This is how I am tackling it.

I love being a student, so I have drawn up a strict time table for studying even after a hard days work. I have always loved reading, so reading the courseware is in fact an enjoyable experience – once a strict time table is set. I also like to write down my thoughts. I decided, instead of being philosophical, I will write about what I have read on that day, there by effectively revising what I read – Hobby and study both accomplished. Last but not the least; I love to post my blog with relevant photos. I will browse the net and find some photos/articles that are relevant to what ever I have read on that particular day and pot it in my blog. Today will be first of these series of posts.

Well, today I learned about leadership in an organizational setup. I learned about the various theories of leadership and how communication skills are very important for an effective leader.

Leadership, by the way is the art of influencing the behavior of your collogues/subordinates in a positive way so that the goals and objectives of the organization are met. Many scientists have done a lot of study to understand this “art”. The various studies can be broadly classified into Trait theory, behavioral, Situational/contingency theory and finally transformational theory.

Trait theory says that leaders are born and not made. This theory says that leaders are a gifted lot. It tries to describe the various traits that leaders somehow acquired. But, the crux here was that many successful leaders had contradictory traits. This theory was hence not successful. The next theory propounded was behavioral theory. This theory says that leaders can be developed. They have certain set of behavior’s that make them an effective leader. Any person who consciously learns and adapts himself to these set of behavior, will become a leader (like consideration for employees, consideration for achieving the goals etc. Based on the behavior the manager himself they can be classified as an autocrat, Benevolent, consultative or participative leader. One particular theory I liked was the “Management Grid” theory. In this the consideration for the employee is on the x axes and the productivity on the Y axes. Value of these axes can range from 1 through nine. Based on this grid the leader can be classified as impoverished leader, Autocratic leader, Country club leader, middle of the road leader and finally Team leader. A person should always aim to be a team oriented leader (High consideration for employees and productivity). But this again failed to give a permanent solution to the question. So, situational theory was proposed. This theory says that a leader must always change his leadership style depending on the situation. He should ask himself certain basic questions before adopting a particular style. Or, he could use the path goal approach in which he defines the goal for the subordinate and depending on the personality of the subordinate lay out the path to achieve the goal. Finally the Transformational theory was proposed. Transformational leaders are the ones who inspire phenomenal output out of their subordinates. Nobody till date has been able to pin point the way transformational leaders are developed.

Finally, today I read about the various communications that flows in an organization (Downward, upward, horizontal and crosswise), Model of communication process, barriers of communication and finally the ways to overcome communication barrier.

Hmmmm….a lot of stuff read. Personally I have some opposing views on what ever I read – but about that later. For now, I am pretty paranoid about my exam and “I want to do well” :-)

MBA...

Well…I am having my MBA exams on 20th and 27th of this month. This leaves me with seven more days to prepare for my exams. Of course I am tense. I need a lot of good wishes and good luck – both for preparing as well as writing for my exam.

I have been reading my MBA courseware voraciously off late. What I have learnt till now is that management is all about five things – Planning, Organizing, Staffing, leading and controlling. Each of these five fields forms the cornerstone for Management study.

Planning is the phase wherein you plan for your Goals, objectives and mission as an organization. Organizing deals with giving a formal structure to your organization. It involves creating various hierarchy structures of employees, breaking your organization into departments and divisions etc. The main thing here is that your organizing should be in line and complement your plan/goal for the organization. Staffing is the process of putting the right people in the right places in the hierarchy structure developed in the organizing phase. Leading is then guiding and influencing the behavior of the haired employees so that “they” can help you to achieve the goals of the organization. Controlling deals with the various ways in which you have to control you finance, communication, morale etc for the smooth functioning of the organization.

I personally like the leading part of management. The main reason I like this is because in today’s scenario to be become a true leader, you have to truly understand and know people. You have to know what is it that motivates people. Why do people behave the way they do? How to get along with people to achieve a common goal? How to handle conflicts in work place? Etc. It feels good to get into the minds of some of the greatest of Physcology/management thinkers. It’s good to know what their opinions are on these topics (like Peter F. Drucker, Abraham Maslow, Victor H. Vroom, David C. McClelland etc...)

The another reason why I like the literature on leading is because I truly believe that each and every person is a leader in his/her very own way. A father is the financial leader in his home. A mother is the emotional in her home. A teacher is a leader for molding a child’s character. A sweeper is a leader of cleanliness of his area. I am a leader for myself; I am responsible for managing myself. So, I think everyone is a leader in one way or the other. And the literature present in management for organizational leadership can also extended to personal/family leadership. Maybe we will have to modify it a bit to take care of the human element. For example, have a look at Maslow pyramid proposed to know the motive behind people’s work in organization. A look at it and you will know how relevant it is in our personal life as well. We too – maybe unconsciously – Plan, organize, staff, lead and control ourselves in our life.

All said and done, days are slipping by, and I need to write my Exams. Wish me luck :-)

Friends..

I have always believed that God loves me. One of the best examples for this is the friends he has given me. I have been blessed with some Great friends who have touched every part of my life. I Thank God a Million times for giving me such great friends.

I traveled down my memory lane to find out what would have happened if I had no friends? What would have happened if God did not send friends to me in difficult time?

Whom would I play with in my childhood? How would I derive a sense of belongingness during my young days? How would it be if I were alone without friends when I first arrived in Delhi at the age of 13? How would I have made my first year in college enjoyable if I were alone? Who would I have talked to about my first love in engineering college days? Who would I turn to when I went to Bangalore with nothing more then dreams in my eyes? Where would I look for help when I was stolen off my money and left penniless on the streets of Hyderabad - on my first day of arrival? Who would have helped me when I was cheated by a person promising me that he will find a room for me to stay in Hyderabad? Who would have helped me when I first walked into a hostile and competitive company as a fresher? Who would have listened to me when I needed a shoulder to cry upon? Who would have calmed me when I am angry about someone/something? ...

The list seems endless. It humbles me when I think how many wonderful friends God has given me. When ever I have been in trouble (and I am in that zone very often), God has always sent me a friend to help me solve my problems. I would not have been what I am today if it were not for a bunch of friends who held me in my difficult times.

A million thanks to God!!!!

Solitude...

Silence, it is said has a thousand words. I love Silence. I like to sit quietly and let my mind astray. I like to listen to myself in the stillness of silence. Most valuable lessons that I have learnt have been in the midst of silence. Solitude I think is the greatest treasure that any one can ever have.

How true was Barton when he said – “Sometimes when I consider what tremendous consequence comes from little things… I am tempted to think… There are no little things”. I love to walk alone in silent nights. The cool breeze, the humming of some far off bird, the rustle of the leaves that I stepped onto, the muffled sounds of TV sets. All these make me feel alive. They tell me how much there is to listen – both within me and outside me.

Solitude is my biggest treasure and my best teacher. And I live in the depths of my solitude

Corporate Mughal

Like any company, our company too serves a client. Recently the country technical head of our client was supposed to have a meeting in our office. Of course all the preparations were made for his visit. Relevant data was collected, presentations were made, mock meetings took place and managers were given a list of do’s and don’ts to be strictly adhered to in the meeting.

The day finally arrived. Our managers of course were in top form. They came out with their best dresses and put on their best smiles. No stone was left unturned to make the country head happy. What happened later was a perfect anti climax. The client came and took everybody left and right. The choosiest of offensive language that can be used in a corporate setting was used. He literally shook up everyone. He conveyed in clear terms that it is output that he wants – nothing more and nothing less. Not a single person could stand up and speak back, because of the position and power that he commanded.

This made me think. How do people at the top of the food chain in corporate setting get there? What is it that separates them from the rest? What might be going on in their mind when there were in my stage of their carrier? Were they always brilliant? Were they born leaders or life’s experience thought them to become leaders? A torrent of question came flooding in my mind. The bottom line being – I too want to be in that position some day and command power – How do I do that?

I have always had my own set of corporate heroes. I have liked their tenacity and the fire in their belly to succeed and do something great. Some of my corporate heroes are – Steve Jobs (Apple), Jack Welch (GE), Bill Gates (Microsoft), Naryan Murthy (Infosys), Azim Premji (Wipro), Linus Trovolds (Linux), Richard Stallman (GNU)….etc. I am sure I will be writing a lot about these guys in my future posts. I have read one or the other book written by these people. I have always tried to find some common points in these kings which made them great. One thing of course is that they always knew they are here for something BIG. But there is also one Negative thing common in all these Guys (at least I think so) and that is – Neglect of personal life.

Steve Jobs at one point did not know what he was supposed to do and joined Hare Krishna movement and was a hippy for long time. Jack Welch’s wife divorced him because she thought he was not giving much of his time to family. Bill Gates was a college dropout. Azim permji took over the business because his brothers were not willing to take up the work. Linus Trovolds is considered by many to be too secretive and does not how to socialize with people. What I want to tell is, if you are on your way to greatness on the corporate world, somewhere down the lane, personal life takes a backseat (or at least that is what I feel).

Is it possible to be at the top of the food chain and still be a great family person? Is it possible to strike that perfect balance with work and life? Is it possible to be CEO of some company while being a faithful son, great brother, loving husband and a sincere friend to some human being? If the answer to these questions is YES - then that person is a true Corporate Moughal. And someday I would love to be a true corporate mughal :-)

Never Ever Give up!!!!!!!

I have always wanted to be a "Never say die" person. I don’t want to give up, I don’t want to give in - when I know I am right. No matter what the situation.

I simply love to read any story that has people showing this "never say die" attitude. And if this happens to be a real life story, it also inspires me.

Recently I read a similar true incident that inspired me. It's the story of the workers of Wilmington plant of general motors and their struggle to stop their factory from shutting down. Following is an extract of that story

In the early 1990's, General motors (GM) decided to shut down its assembly plant located in Wilmington. They sent a group of executives to convey this message. The executives addressed the 3500 employees of the plant and told them about GM's decision to shut down the plant by 1996 in order to reduce cost.

The announcement left the workers stunned. When the GM executives left, Ralph Harding, the manager of the plant, made a passionate speech to the employees. He said "There maybe nothing we can do to affect this decision. But there is something we can do: we can make them feel really stupid!! Because they are going to be closing the best plant in General motors!!” He motivated the employees with his speech and fired them up with the desire to make their plant one of the best of GM's plant by 1996 - the year it was meant to be closed down.

The union leaders and management started to work together to reduce costs and to improve quality of production. The employees took it up as a challenge and started working towards reducing costs and improving quality of the products. Their motto was to become the best and thus make the top management feel ashamed of their plan of closing down the plant.

In less the two years, the Wilmington plant became one of GM's best plants and the car dealer began making specific orders for car models Chevy Corsica and Beretta, produced in the plant. The employees succeeded in achieving what they wanted to do - To prove that GM's decision to close down the plant was a foolish one. In 1996 GM decided against closing down the plant.

Such a great story, makes you want read it again and again.... :-)

What a great Poem....

Recetly I came across a wonderful poem on happiness...I found it to be soo good, I thought it shold write it here. It can be read, re read and re re read...So enjoy :-)

Be happy

Light is sweet,

and it pleases the eyes to see the sun.

However many years a man may live,

let him enjoy them all.

But let him remember the days of the darkness,

for they will be many.

Everything to come is meaningless.

Be happy, young man, while you are young.

And let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth.

Follow the ways of your heart and whatever your eyes see.

But know that for all these things God will bring you to judgment.

So then, banish anxiety from your heart.

And cast off the troubles of your body,

for youth and vigor are meaningless.

Has this ever happened to you??

There is a strange and intriguing experience that happened to me recently in office...

Have you ever been very angry about something/someone? So angry that when you think about that particular person, anger starts seething within you? You feel that he is the only person responsible for all your misery?I am sure that everyone will be having such kind of anger for someone at one point of time or other....

Like many people I too had such kind of a person, recently I happened to confront this particular person. It was mayhem, an all out barrage of accusations and counter accusations. I squeezed out every bit of my anger right in front of that person.

After I had this no holds barred fight with this person, I felt certain calm within me. When I sat and thought over the entire thing, I began to feel that the person was not that bad after all. I began to feel that the reason why I was getting angry on that person was because my perception about that person himself was clouded because of my anger. I felt that after all everything was there in my mind and "Maybe" that person was not that bad after all.

I think I have always been very different and unique in the way I look and feel things. This duality of thought is also something that has always been there with me. I don’t know if this is something that happens only to me or others people also experience such kind of "strange" things? People might say I am not good at handling my emotions. But I personally don't agree to it. I know my shortcomings, am aware of my emotions and have courage enough to talk about them.

Now I don’t know how to face that person next time I visit him. Should I say sorry to that person (which my ego does not allow me)? Should I forget everything and go about my work coolly? Should I act as if I am still angry? How should I avoid such kind of things in future?

Life sometimes throws puzzles at you which are so difficult to understand. It angers you, amuses you, makes you think and puzzles you - all at the same time. It’s something like the attached picture, It's a true lie :-)

Karma - Nah....!!!!!

I was a Kid when I first heard about the concept of Karma. This has always intrigued me, fascinated me and more often then not, made me think.

Does a something like karma really exist? Is it true that whatever is happening to me is because of my past actions? Is there truly a master accountant sitting somewhere above high in the skies and keeping a tab on each and everything I do? And after I am "die", I go to that accountant for performance appraisal and depending on my performance, I am either awarded or punished in my "next life".

True or otherwise, I have always disliked this concept. It makes you feel like a puppet. And sometimes I also feel that it was a concept developed by some pundit to give reasons for things which seemingly were wrong and nobody wanted to own responsibility (like a person dying young, a good person facing hardship, young kids being murdered etc...). I am strongly of the opinion that this is a cooked up story - a make believe concept to make you feel that everything is ok. God can never be an accountant, keeping tab on me.

In comparison to this I like the concept that I am in charge of what is happening to me. If I desire for something so much that it pours out from every part of my being, then the entire universe will conspire with me to help me get to that desire. I think getting punished in this life due to some bad things that I did in my previous life (which I don’t even remember) is not the way God works. What I feel is maybe God wants us to live this life as a traveler. Always exploring, searching, knowing, realizing and improving. Life is not a series of predetermined sequence, but a series of choices that God gives on our way. We are then to make our own choices and these choices will decide how our story ends. In short, God has laid out the entire life in front of us, complete with all the choices and the different endings each choice will have. He then involves us in this game of life interactively and tells us "Son, you decide how you want this story to end".

As compared to the Karma concept, the above concept is more logical, more "God like". Yes of course, there still will be a lot of questions that remain unanswered. Why then God wants us to suffer (I don’t know if I am using the right word)? Why we face so many heart breaks in this Journey? Why is it so difficult to find a soul mate, who will travel the road with you? The list seems endless...

But nonetheless, maybe God does not want us to know the answer when we set out on this journey. Maybe he does not want to spoil the fun and suspense. Moreover if I knew everything, wouldn’t I be GOD???? :-)

Transactional analysis anybody??

Let me first start with the a little fact file - The attached photo is that of Dr. Eric Berne. He was a Psychology professor and propounder of Transactional analysis.

I came across this term when reading my MBA courseware. Must tell, suddenly I am feeling great interest for Psychology. Psychology truly is a very interesting and intriguing subject.

I really marvel at the human brain and the free will God has given us. It’s wonderful how we can first think and then think and find out exactly what made us think as we thinked!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have always been a Math Geek, an engineer at heart. As such I thought that science and math’s are the "Real sciences". I thought that these are the only subjects that work on solid logical reasoning. 1+1 is always 2 be it today or a hundred years from now. Rate of change of momentum is directly proportional to the applied force and acts in the direction of the force applied, today, tomorrow or a hundred years later. But I might feel happy today, sad tomorrow and Jubilant 10 days later. I mean, this - feeling - thing is unpredictable.

I was charmed at my first encounter with Psychology. I was amused to know that the way I behave might have a logical reason as well. I read the transactional analysis theory proposed by Dr. Eric Berne. I fell in love with Psychology.

As per Eric, each person is made up of three alter ego states - Parent, child and adult. He then goes on to say how these alter ego states take shape. How they affect the way we respond to day to day situations. How and why - one Ego state is dominant at one time and the other at another time. I also read about "strokes". Stroke is the term we use for the type of acknowledgement we give to a person. Stroke can be positive, negative or don’t care. The concept of strokes is then combined with child, adult and parent theory to know how the various ego states interact with each other. He then goes one step ahead and tells when and exactly why communication go wrong and the way to avoid it. The icing on cake is the real life example he gives, which are eerily accurate.

It was wonderful to read a different stream of science. It was an eye opener. In fact now I feel that Psychology in its most basic form should be studied by everyone. It tells a lot about yourself, which if used properly can improve you into a better person....

Gandhiji - My hero

Today is the Birthday of Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, otherwise called as Mahatma Gandhi. I thought I will write down a few things about Mahatma in today’s post.

I have always admired Gandhiji. I prefer to call him as Gandhiji rather then Mahatma. This is because the title Mahatma makes him almost godlike and the expectation from him increases almost tenfold. What – I think – we should not forget is that Gandhiji was after all a human being. He was no demi God. He made his share of mistakes (like we all do). I see Gandhji’s life as a triumph of the human will. His life inspires me, and I am a great fan of his.

I am sure there will be a lot of people out there who will not agree to what I write. They will be people who criticize gandhiji, who feel that he was after all not as great as people project him to be. For them I have to say this – I respect your views; you have the freedom of your views. But in the similar way I have my freedom as well, and for me Gandhi is a Hero.

Now let me try and rationalize why I love Gandhiji. What is it in him that appeals to me? Why do I think he is great person? Well, one of the reasons for it I can say is I read his Autobiography – My experiments with truth – at a very early age (when I was in class eighth). This book of his has made a profound effect on how I see this person.

I learnt from this book that after all he was a human. He too has faced the same problem that we all faced. He too tried his hands on Beedi in his youth, he too used to lie like all of us do, he too felt angry like each and every one of us when we see injustice, he too used to spent his night with his wife when his father was n the deathbed ailing. He too felt strongly about what he believes in, and went all out to convince others when he felt that he was right. In short, he was very much human like you, me, or the person moving on the street.

If he had all the drawbacks like each and every one of us – what is it that made him Mahatma?? Why is it that even people around the world including Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther king Jr, Mother Teresa, Richard gere, Dalai Lama and countless other people around the world are charmed by him?? No, he did not have a great physique. No, he never used a gun. No, he was not a great orator. No, he was not rich. No, he was not an intellectual genius. He was a very common and passable Indian. No, he was no king. No, he was not vested with any power.

What is it then that made him such a phenomenon?? I personally feel the reason for this was that a common Indian man could connect himself with him. They could identify with what he said. They could easily walk his talk. That was possible because he did not tell people to go on war. He did not tell people to leave their near and dear ones and go into hiding. He did not ask for Blood – ours or our enemies.

Just take this small exercise frankly. Let’s say two different people come to you for a good cause. One of them asks you to take a gun and come along with him so that the root cause of the problem can be shot to death. The other person tells you to show small acts of defiance (like stop buying certain cloths, stop paying bills, stop using foreign materials etc) and assures you that doing so on a large scale will non violently kill the root cause of the problem. Whom will you follow??

He just asked people to be themselves. He asked them to assert themselves. He asked people to stand for what you felt was right. He walked with people. He lived the common man’s life. He was very Indian even in his stature. Indian people, by their very culture nature, could – as I previously said – connect to what he said. And it is this factor that made Gandhiji such a great person. He did not develop an Atom Bomb. He developed the concept of being yourself and nonviolently assert yourself for the cause of truth.

People will still raise 100 questions on gandhiji. Yes, maybe he might have been wrong at times. That’s because he was a human like each and every one of us. That is what makes Gandhiji such a phenomenon.

Gandhiji – you inspire me and you are my hero!!!!

What happens when Ideology clash happens??

Again it’s an observation I did in office. I was previously working in a very good Company (Am not naming any names here). The boss I had there was one of the very best bosses anyone can ever get. He was intelligent, sensitive and dedicated. I loved the way of his work, and as a person I learnt a lot from him.

Due a series of mergers’ and acquisitions I landed in a different company. The new boss who is now at the helm of affairs is Practical, outspoken and Professional. Though most people don’t like the way of his work, he does get the work done and as a professional he has a lot to teach me as well.

In short terms - if my old boss is north, the new is south. If the old is day, the new is night. There are huge differences in their way of working, thinking and getting the work done. If old boss is innocent and goes about doing his own work, the new boss is a charmer; he gets his work done from others.

But one thing which is common in both these guys is the immense confidance they have in themselves, the power they command is same,both think their style of working is the best and both are the the best in managing a telecom network.

Now due to some turn of events, both of them are made to take care of the same network. One as the owner of the network and other as the vendor for that network. The ensuing clashes that take place, the misunderstandings that takes place and the sheer mayhem that occurs due to these two giants being at the helm is simply huge.

I for one have been stuck in a very critical position. I have tremendous respect for my old boss, but I have commitments towards my new boss. And so many times there is a clash between my respect and commitments. And I can tell you - It's very difficult to take decision and act.

All said and done, what I personally feel is when such kind of a thing occurs, it is the people who are working at ground level that suffer the most. Due to the top level fighting (and both being genius in their own rights) the lower level engineer's are lost. They do not know what to do and whom to support.

And in this entire scuffle, you will find some people who will take advantage of this confusion and go about spoiling others names, settle personal scors, back biting and playing the cheapest of politics. I hate these kinds of people - because I have been victimized by such kind of people.

In any case, this clash of ideology and clash of titans has taught me some very good lesson, it has taught me how people play politics when confusion is in vogue, I now am very careful before Judging a person, I have learnt the lesson that no matter how big a genius you become - Its nothing till you conquer your ego....Thanks to both of them I am more mature today then I was a few years ago.